So Festivus is coming up on Friday. Rather that just do my Airing of Grievances straight up, I’m doing them in the form of New Rules. :) Why? Well, why not?

Here goes… Part one. Yes, Part One.

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New Rule: Former dictators can’t act like divas in prison.
Two weeks ago, Sadaam Hussein didn’t show up to trial because he thought the trial itself was unjust. Earlier this week, he refused to show up in court because he didn’t have any clean underwear. He’s also complained about unsavoury conditions in prison itself. Look, fella. I don’t care that you were president of Iraq; virtually no one taking you to trial does. Mmmkay? As far as anyone else is concerned, you’re finally getting a taste of your own medicine. *nod*

The day in the Sadaam Hussein trial.

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New Rule: No more wars on concepts or holidays!
First it was the “war on drugs”. It hasn’t been won. Then it was the “war on terror(ism)”. With or without the “-ism”, despite what GWB may think, we’re not exactly winning that, either.

Now? Apparently some Christians out there think there’s a “war on Christmas”.

This one just takes the cake. Not to mention it’s another case of a handful of them taking something–various stores refusing to wish their patrons a “Merry Christmas” and wishing them “Happy Holidays” instead–and blowing it way out of proportion. Years ago, Christians were whining about Christmas being too commercial for them. Now they’re mad because the check-out guy at Target is wishing them “Happy Holidays” and not “Merry Christmas”. Make up your minds, people? What do you want?

Or maybe the real reason some of them are pissed off is because those who celebrate other holidays–Advent, Yule, Solstice, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa–are finally being treated equally; and it’s driving them up the wall. Maybe someone needs to remind them that December 25–the day on which Christmas is celebrated (and this year, Hanukkah starts on the same day)–was originally a Pagan holiday (the feast of the Son of Isis–she being the Pagan goddess of Nature; the birth of Mithras; among other things), and that it only became Christmas in the year 350, as a means of converting the Pagan Romans to convert to Christianity. Many of those old Pagan traditions–the feasting, the Yule log, the Christmas tree–still exist; and I would dare say most Christians take part in those traditions in some form or another.

Anyway, no one is stopping Christians themselves from wishing someone a “Merry Christmas”. Put it on your cards for this year. Shout it out from the rooftops of your house if you want. As long as the sentiment is there, and you really do mean “Merry Christmas”, it doesn’t matter.

Pagan origins of Christmas

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New Rule: If you say no amount of money will send you to a rival team, stick to your word!

Today Red Sox Nation, I can imagine, is very livid about Johnny Damon going to the New York Yankees for $52 million over four years. Back in May, he said he’d never go to the Yanks. He loved Boston. After all, he was part of the biggest comeback ever in ALCS–perhaps even all of baseball–history in 2004, not to mention he helped Boston win their first World Series in 86 years. Where’s Theo Epstein when you really need him? If the Bruins trading Joe Thornton was bad, this is ten times worse.

Thoughts on the Damon acquisition and how it could help those freakin’ Yankees.

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New Rule: Selecting a hockey player who assaulted another hockey player–no matter how good the assaulter may be–is never a good idea.

Vancouver Canuck forward Todd Bertuzzi is among those selected to play on Team Canada at the Olympics in a couple of months. He’s known for his assault on Colorado Avalanche player Steve Moore–who, more likely than not, will never play hockey again–near the end of the 2003-04 season. He was suspended for the rest of that season, and the suspension carried over into the lockout last year. His year of probation that he received in court ends this week.

While some fans have probably forgotten this incident and forgiven Bertuzzi, I doubt others have. I betcha Avs fans who are also Team Canada fans are pissed. Heck, when the incident happened two years ago, I thought that constituted a permanent ban…and not just from the NHL, either. It’s one thing to check a guy into the boards while trying to get the puck to a teammate or whatever. It’s another thing to bash a guy and break his neck. I say, ditch him from the team and take Sidney Crosby instead.

Bertuzzi headed to the Olympics

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To be continued….